Goodbye, 2017

2017 has been a BAD YEAR. A wild medical ride with a lot of unexpected hurdles. Despite it all, I read over 100 books. And most of them were good. There were only a few I didn’t like or didn’t finish. It would be hard to list all my favorites but here are a few recommendations.

March by John Lewis

Turning Japanese by MariNaomi

Another Brooklyn by Jacqueline Woodson

They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera

American Street by Ibi Zoboi

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng

Wild Beauty by Anna-Marie McLemore

Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds

Mean by Myriam Gurba

Depression and Other Magic Tricks by Sabrina Benaim

Hunger by Roxane Gay

Warcross by Marie Lu


September Releases

Summer is coming to an end. (That sound you hear is my tears falling on my keyboard.) But at least it means some great books are being released soon. Four of them from authors I love, I’ve already gotten to read. I am here to make sure you get on those pre-orders or library holds in for a few September releases.

They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera Gut Punch characters
Release Date: September 5, 2017

Want to feel like you’re being stabbed in the heart multiple times throughout one book? Well, do I have the book for you! Several actually. Everything Adam Silvera has written. In this new journey through sorrow, Silvera poses the question “what would you do if you knew it was your last date alive?”

So it goes that the protagonist gets a call that it’s his day to die. (This “service” exists in this version of our world.) Naturally, he makes a friend. (The “they” mentioned in the title.) Not to be too vague, but then a series of things happen. Each chapter gets you more and more attached to characters you know are going to kick the bucket by the end. This book is both a joy and torturous. Heartwarming and heart-wrenching. While it’s busy messing with your emotions, the book also offers important messages about friendship and identity and a whole lot of other things.

Genuine Fraud by E. Lockhart Page Turner Good Ol' Fun
Release Date: September 5, 2017

I rarely hear a lukewarm response to one of E. Lockhart’s books. It’s usually love or hate with no in between thing. I feel like this will be another one of those books.

Lockhart excels at writing female protagonists with a bite. However, this book is a little different than We Were Liars and The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks. It’s a story told backwards, but keeps the suspense as you try to figure out how everything ended up the way it did. The plot is implausible at times and the characters aren’t the type to be loved. I suspect a lot of readers are going to be annoyed by some of the plot reveals and the unlikable qualities of the characters. Lockhart doesn’t set out to make characters you’ll love though. Instead, she writes characters with grit and plots that poke at your suspension of belief. I personally enjoyed the story’s unexpected turns. Will you? I don’t know. But I think it will at least be a page turner for anyone who opens it.

Shadowhouse Fall by Daniel José Older characters  badass 
Release Date: September 12, 2017

If you enjoyed Shadowshaper, you’ll love this second book as well. Sierra and all her friends are back and this time things are a little more hectic. I know what you’re thinking: how can things be more hectic than the last book? Just trust me. It happens.

Sierra’s friends now all being brought into the shadowshaper world makes them an even stronger team of friends. There is a closer look at characters that didn’t get a lot of page time in book one and I love them even more. While they’re all caught up in an ancient battle with enemies they didn’t know existed and there’s something called the Deck of Worlds that’s a puzzle to figure out, there’s still their everyday problems to deal with, too. This book touches on police violence and racism as well as the typical teen issues involving romances and school. These kids have A LOT going on. Daniel José Older is a master at integrating all these conflicts into something that’s both fun to read as a fantasy and important to read as a commentary on Real Life problems.

Also it gets another stellar cover, which I always need to point out.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng fave2 Pretty Words Wow Factor 
Release Date: September 12, 2017

Celeste Ng broke my heart in several different ways in Everything I Never Told You. She’s managed to do it again in her new book. But it’s an honor to have my heart broken by the words of Ng.

This book is just REALLY, REALLY good, okay? I barely know what else to say because I want to talk about every single detail, but that would ruin it for you. I need everyone to read this ASAP so I have someone to talk to. I think about this book a lot even though I finished it weeks ago. I don’t know how Ng does it, but her characters get under my skin. She writes about families so tragically and beautifully. Unlike Everything I Never Told You, which focused on one family, this one juxtaposes several. It’s fascinating. I love it. I need to stop my gushing, but I want to yell I LOVE YOU, CELESTE NG at the top of my lungs. She’d probably think that’s a bit creepy and over the top though. But I can’t help how I feel. Anyway, this book is really good.

So go forth readers and prepare for the fall. Have a cozy spot in mind and put a tissue box there. Your September is going to be good. Also sad, but good.


The Fallen Kingdom by Elizabeth May

“At moments like this, I appreciate how the weather in Scotland is never the same, and how swiftly it changes. How the rain itself seems to breathe, soft and slow.”

The Fallen Kingdom by Elizabeth May
Release Date:  June 13, 2017
Publisher: Chronicle Books
Format: e-ARC
Genres: Young Adult Fiction, Fantasy
Ratings: Page Turner Gut Punch badass

Full disclosure: I adore Scotland so that setting alone will attract me to a book. I had downloaded the first of Elizabeth May’s Falconer series to my Kindle some time ago, but then didn’t read it until I was IN Scotland last summer. I thought the first book was fun and moved onto the second one, which was even better. I grew to love the main character, Aileana, a fierce fae-slayer. As it always is with final books in a series, I (electronically) opened the final installment of the trilogy, “The Fallen Kingdom,” with: a little bit of sadness that I’d have to say goodbye to all the characters by the end; a tiny amount of worry I might hate it; and, of course, tons of excitement. The final verdict? My heart is a little shattered in the best kind of way.

My Thoughts
What interested me in this series to start with, aside from the whole Scotland thing, is how it pulls from dark mythology of the fae/fairies. The “girl falls for immortal creature that can kill her, but he’s more complex that” story has been told many times before, usually in a vampire fashion, but May layers her story with a fascinating history that makes it unique. So while tropes I’m bored of were present in the beginning of the series, it didn’t keep me from reading on. The stakes get higher and higher and the line between “good” and “evil” is tremendously blurry. It’s made the journey of the trilogy exciting instead of cliched.

And this last book? PHEW. It’s a rollercoaster. It’s even darker than the first two. Yes, it’s possible for it to get darker. [Spoilers ahead for those who haven’t read the first two. You can skip to Positives/Negatives]

At the end of the second book, Aileana is in a bit of a pickle. She was a. tortured and then b. murdered and c. the world is also ending. Three things that are rather difficult to overcome. Plus she’s having a complicated love life. Still. The reader is not spared the ugly details of this all. The result is a story that makes you wish you could read even faster. I also felt like my heart was being stabbed a few times, but it’s fine. I survived better than some of the people in the story.

On a more serious note, something I appreciate about this book is how it shows the damage that Lonnrach’s torture had on Aileana. She didn’t walk out of that room of mirrors mentally unscathed. She is brave and she is strong, but what was done to her isn’t something any human can just “overcome.” As I’m not a psychologist, I hesitate to diagnose even an imaginary person, but what happens to her closely resembles PSTD. I find it extremely important that when a character goes through the type of trauma that often happens in fantasy novels, that the emotional and mental result is shown. Aileana is a testament to the fact that some things are too horrible to completely recover from. When it comes to a book for teenagers, this is an important lessen. No matter how strong you are, you can still hurt. Trauma can cause a mental illness that can make things horrible. But you can still keeping going. You can still fight. You can still be the badass heroine.

+Everything about how Aileana’s internal struggles were handled
+Secondary characters had even more development in this book
+It pulls at your heart strings
-The whole immortal love interest still bothers me a little but to balance it out, May did a tremendous job handling that particular trope
-I felt like maybe there could have been a little bit more

In Summary
“The Fallen Kingdom” is an excellent finale to the trilogy. It’s fast paced and terrifying at moments. The ending is satisfying. And while all the literal fighting is happening, the internal battles are even more riveting. I think most fans of the series will be happy with the conclusion.

Note: An advanced copy of this book was provided free by the publisher for review consideration. This in no way influenced my opinion.


Interview with a Snarky/Cynical 16 Year Old

I happen to live with a teenaged sister who loves to read. While our tastes in books often overlap, she’s a bit more critical than I am. Which often means I lend her a YA book and she hates it. An opposing view can be a good/amusing thing so I invited her to do some future posts with me. As a way of an introduction, I did an “interview” with her. So, meet Barbara, a girl who rarely answers any questions completely seriously.

What kind of books do you most like to read?
Um, I don’t know. I just don’t fucking know, dude. Oh, well, comic books. I guess.

What is the best book you’ve read recently?
Maus. The n*zi thing. That’s the only thing I can remember.

[Anna’s Note: Babs says she feels like calling it “the n*zi thing” was insensitive. Actually her exact words in the email were “also now that i looked at it reducing maus to a nazi thing seems pretty insenstivie fuk.” (She demanded she read how I transcribed things before I posted it.)]

What was the worst book you’ve read recently?
Huckleberry Finn. The Adventures of. Which I didn’t really read. I sort of read it.

Do you have a favorite author?
God is the author of my heart.

[She laughed after this and made me take it out because she didn’t want people to know she was laughing, but I’m just putting it in this note instead.]

For real though…
I don’t know any authors. Maybe like….. I don’t think I’ve consistently read one author in my life.

What is your biggest book pet peeve?
Hmm. There’s a lot. Love triangles. When they don’t describe things like setting or anything like that. You know? It’s just not good. Just books in general.

Do you have a favorite character?
I guess Laika, the first dog to go to space.

She technically doesn’t count because she’s real.
No, she counts. She’s still a character… I can’t think of any characters I like. I can’t really think of any books I like. I don’t remember the past three years of my life.

[I originally called Laika a “he” which she yelled at me for, so I fixed it. Then I got yelled out via email for editing my mistake. “also you called laika a he dont fuckin deny it.”]

What’s a book you are excited to come out?
The next “Shadowshaper” book.

[One of the rare occasions where we both loved the same YA book. Good job, Daniel José Older, you won over a cynical af teen.]

What do you like most about “Shadowshaper?”
Just like the overall concept, I guess. I don’t know. She’s just like “yeah I fucking paint stuff.” That’s nice I guess.

[This is called being purposefully difficult.]

Actually I want you to make my favorite author, Jesse Moynihan. And my favorite character, Serapis. It’s in Moynihan’s comic “Forming.”

Do you have a favorite book trope?
Give examples. There’s a lot of tropes. There’s a dictionary of tropes.

I don’t know. Just anything you like in books.
I like when.. I like bugs. Any mention of bugs. At any point. At any time. It makes me happy. And hopeful, you know?

Has any book other than The Book Thief made you cry?
That’s very personal. I don’t think so. Anna, I don’t want people to know I cried at The Book Thief.

[I didn’t put this in without her permission. She accepted it after.]

What do you think about my taste in books?
I think your taste in books and media in general is bad. And I don’t think people reading your reviews should trust you.

I want to change my favorite trope. I like when there is character development. And bugs.

That’s not a trope.
I don’t give a shit.

What is your favorite nonfiction book?
The Poop Book.

I’m not putting that in.

I’m serious. It’s actually informative. And don’t edit my words.

Any final thoughts?
Shout out to Persepolis, even though everyone knows about it, I want to give it a little shout out. Shout out to my fans. Shout out to my family and friends. Shout out to bugs. Don’t step on bugs. And if you hear someone screaming, call 911 and don’t listen to your family. [Apparently she heard someone screaming earlier.] Don’t treat OCD like it’s a cute habit where you just like to organize things. It’s a serious illness. Just chill the fuck out. Who cares? That’s it.


And there you have it. Words on books and such from a real life teen. Look out for future interviews/reviews where she is certain to frustrate me.


Thirteen Reasons Why: A Messy Reflection

Trigger Warning: Discussion of suicide, depression, self harm, etc.


  1. I am not a mental health professional. This is just the musings of someone with depression and anxiety.
  2. It has recently come to my attention that Jay Asher has in the past searched his name on Twitter and harassed teenagers who didn’t like his book. That is abusive and unacceptable behavior and I do not support him and will not read any of his other books. I read Thirteen Reasons Why before I knew any of this (or perhaps before it even happened.) I would not have read the book had I known this.
  3. I do not recommend anyone read this book knowing number 2 and for other reasons I will discuss later.
  4. There will be spoilers.

Thirteen Reasons Why is a book I read a number of years ago. I was still struggling with depression, but I was at one of my more steady periods. Suicidal thoughts weren’t plaguing me and I felt a little more grounded. At that time, I loved the book. I related to Hannah. Her experience was vastly different than mine, but I found pieces of my own mental illness and I felt less alone.

At this time I also wasn’t very involved with the YA community. The way I found books was very different than how I do now. There were definitely better books out there on the topic of depression, but this is just the one I found.

In light of the Netflix series, I’ve reflected more on the book and read other people’s criticisms and can see the faults I didn’t recognize before. I’ve also done a lot more over the years to learn about my own mental illness and how it impacts others differently. I can see where the book can be damaging for others with depression. I can see where it can lead people without the experience of mental illness to believe things that aren’t true. I understand all of this, but I can’t completely let go of where the book helped me.

That’s the thing about representation of mental illness. Everyone’s experiences are so unique. Triggers are so personal. The line between helpful and harmful is at a different place for everyone. It makes it really difficult to determine where a book falls.

Here are some points I took from the book when I first read it:

  1. Not everyone’s depression looks the same, but you’re also not alone.
  2. There aren’t reasons for suicide. Hannah was already depressed. There were just things that didn’t help. Maybe the reasons I’m grasping at for my own depression aren’t actual reasons.
  3. People should be kinder to each other.
  4. Things that people without mental illness can endure can sometimes have a greater effect on people with depression. My reactions to events are different than other people’s.

Just to name a few. And with a lot of these, other people saw the OPPOSITE. That the book was saying people kill themselves for specific reasons. That it glorified suicide. And I completely see that perspective now. It just wasn’t how I saw it when I first read the book. Maybe if I had read it a different time, when my depression was at its worse, the effect would have been different.

Now I believe the book is likely to be more harmful than helpful for most people. (The television show had made up for some of the faults, and then went terribly, terribly wrong by showing the suicide. A suicide they made bloody when it wasn’t in the book. It was a mistake big enough to pretty much cancel out all the good. I enjoyed the series until then, but maybe it isn’t a coincidence I had a mental breakdown the day after marathoning the episodes.) It’s not something I’d recommend. I wouldn’t put it in the hands of a teen with depression. But what about the ones who have read it already and it helped them? What about those who could relate? I also don’t want to disparage them or make them think something is wrong with them for liking it. After all, I had found worth in it at one point.

I don’t know what the answer is here. If there even is one. Mental illness is messy and so is the representation of mental illness. Even books that take the absolute most care are going to be damaging to someone. I could write the story of my own struggle with 100% truthfulness and it could still be harmful to someone else.

That doesn’t mean the damaging aspects of Thirteen Reasons Why, as the book or Netflix series, are off the hook. It’s a problem to be discussed. I think the overall positive impact is narrow. But when it comes to mental illness as a topic as a whole, there’s a lot to be done. More careful representation needs to be out there. And when we fight to keep out things with harmful descriptions from future readers, we can’t forget the ones that have already read it. There are ones who need help because of the harm. And there are ones who found comfort, who shouldn’t be made to feel stupid.

And perhaps a little more mental health education worldwide would stop some of the jokes coming off the Netflix series that make light of suicide. Maybe if more people understood what mental illness entails, those suffering would have the help they need instead of just going to books and shows to feel less alone. 

Here are some other posts I read discussing the book/show: